THE THIN LINE BETWEEN GOD-COMPLEX VERSUS IMPOSTER SYNDROME

INTRODUCTION

Few days to my 10th birthday, I dislocated my ankle. It was such an ugly experience that I never forgot to this day. Every day, I went with my dad to treat the injury, and on one of these occasions, he said to me: "Son, one of the best solutions to a problem is not attaching too much importance to the problem, accept the problem, but don't give it too much recognition" Let's see the relevance of this lesson.

Imposter syndrome and god-complex are two sides of a coin, they are two extremes, they are equal and opposites and they don't affect us solely, but also our relationships at all levels.

My aim isn't merely to lay bare what imposter syndrome and god-complex means and how to avoid them or prevent them from affecting us negatively; but I wish to explore both from a different perspective, so we can accept and not avoid them. So we can love them and not detest them. It is through acceptance(love) and not fear(hatred) that we can harness both towards our own profits.

THE FRIEND I DREAD

We were taught in school at a very young age, that one of the characteristics of a living person, and indeed the first in the order of listing, is 'movement', Only living beings are capable of this character. Movement as we well know isn't just physical, but psychological, social, spiritual, and emotional too. We even use the term in the field of commerce. Therefore, according to the Italian scholar, Battista Mondin:

"There is in human action, a constant tension to go beyond all the already-acquired results: there is a push to go beyond, to go further; there is a will to reach the most advanced levels. Tending to the realization of a determined man-project, he always finds himself unfulfilled; for this reason, he can never be satisfied on the throne of conquered successes, and he feels unfulfilled; somewhat constrained to retake the work of his own perfection almost from the beginning"

If we go by the above assertion, we will come to realize that this character of man (movement) is natural and if this is so, we are bound to always experience "imposter syndrome" We will always feel insufficient and unfulfilled, and we will always feel there is something more to be done, something we didn't do well. In addition to this, we also tend to compare ourselves with some who have been there before us and our uneasiness gets even larger.

This uneasiness then drives us to another extreme which is the opposite of the former, whereas the former, relates to self-pity and insufficiency, the latter relates to self-assertion and projection.

Let's imagine that Mr. A has imposter syndrome and Mrs. B has a god complex and both of them work in the same organization, let's see the possible ways that both characters will affect the organization. Now Mr. A feels he's insufficient and sees only his nothingness, Mrs . B on the other hand feels only her somethingness and her abilities. Mr. A is so afraid to take up any tasks or challenges that can help the organization and Mrs. B is so confident that she knows all, she takes up every task and opportunity not geared towards helping the organization grow, but to project herself as the best, eventually, she doesn't see the need to work with a team or the essence of research and deep thinking and so she messes up the organization's chances of progress. This is exactly a practical way that both can affect and stunt personal and collective growth.

We have seen therefore that both imposter syndrome and god-complex aren't abstract issues but they are realistic, we must, therefore, accept that they exist and then devise means to handle and curb their excesses.

GOD-COMPLEX VERSUS SUPERIORITY COMPLEX

It is good to separate the two as they are sometimes used interchangeably. In summary, both have to do with the outright denial of one's limits and weaknesses and projection of one's infallibility, superiority, and abilities, seeing oneself as above errors or limits. However, one who has a superiority complex is more humane and empathic and is easy to relate with but one with a god complex lacks empathy or any human touch, and never accepts excuses or failures from others, especially surbordinates.

CURBING THE EXCESSES OF IMPOSTER SYNDROME

Acceptance: This is the first step towards solving any problem, if you don't accept that there is a problem, then you don't see the need for a solution, you treat it with indifference and in the end, it destroys you.

Don't let feedbacks dictate your worth: Some fall on the praises of people or their bosses to know how good or bad they are, but no, granted that praises are necessary but they shouldn't be the sole determinant of your worth. What then should determine your worth? This leads us to the third...

Let past projects and history be the determinant: I do tell myself after I see some posts on LinkedIn and other platforms that look so nice: "Hey, Maurice, the only competitor here is myself" The first day I stepped into a computer science class, I was lost, I didn't follow up for close to 2months and I was afraid to even ask or answer questions. Most of these guys had a background in CS which I didn't have and I resumed later than them. But I remembered those past experiences which seemed impossible then and how I overcame them successfully, I once again reassured myself that this is a new challenge and that I can and will do it again. This helped me to scale through and I saw myself coping with the lectures and every other thing.

Don't hesitate to take up challenges: How else can one examine one's strengths and weaknesses if not by challenging oneself. Take up that challenge today, even if you have just basic knowledge of it, give it a try, go back and learn the places you made mistakes and come back to it. Make sure you give it your best so that even if it wasn't so good, you'll console yourself with the fact that you learned something new and that you gave it your best shot.

Reward Yourself: No matter how small the project is, give yourself a treat. Any little progress you make in your life's journey, cheer yourself. Always remember " You are your best fan"

CURBING THE EXCESSES OF GOD-COMPLEX

Acceptance: This too is a necessary factor towards limiting the excesses of the god-complex

Respect limits: There is a popular saying that your right begins where another's right ends and vice versa. Learn to treat others in the same way you will love to be treated.

A leaf in the branch: Always remember this, you're a team and your success or downfall depends on that of the others. As a leaf in the branch, learn to both direct and obey, don't just be exceptional in leading but in following too. Learn to listen and not just speak, in this way, you'll learn to accept the uniqueness of others and also check your excesses.

Learn Empathy: This step might be the hardest, yet, it's a very important step. Visit that employee who is sick, bereaved, or in any sort of crisis. Check up on them, and send them wishes on their important days. Praise first before blaming, apologise before accusing.

Meet a Therapist: Let a professional help you to keep records of your progress in this regard and as much as possible, learn to open up to your therapist.